To be short, I’m not very tall.
Google says I’m a little below average, but working next to cameras often emphasizes my shortcoming. I’m reminded of it when tilting monitors down as the camera goes up on the DP’s shoulder; when I stand on my tippy toes to peak at a lens marking as the camera sits high on the sticks; or when I’m asked to cram into a car to shoot driving scenes – like what happened recently.
Early in our shooting day, the director of photography (DP), director, and I had been talking about another job the DP wanted me on. It was one of those low-pay “favor” jobs and my reluctance was palpable, so we were talking about who could be assistant camera (AC) in place of me. The name of a mutual friend arose who has plenty of production experience, but is not an AC by trade and would basically be a set of hands for the DP.
“Colin can’t do it. He’s too tall to be an AC,” I said sarcastically.
“What do you mean?” The director asked with a tilt of her head.
I challenged her: “Think about it. Do you know any tall AC’s? We’re all short. DP’s are often tall, though”
In a silly picture a friend posted on Facebook once, two AC’s are laying down in a straight line across a hallway: one with his feet against the wall and the other with his feet near the first one’s head. The caption read, “Human tape measures.” To which a quick-witted commentor offered: “The room is approximately 4′ across.”
In my own life, I’ve wrestled with being short on and off set. Once my then-girlfriend threw me a shade of doubt after I claimed I was 5’ 9” when getting sized for skis. As anybody in a loving relationship knows, doubling down on this claim was my only option. I emphatically pushed that I was 5′ 9″ and even showed her my license which had it listed (never mind it’s self-reported to the DMV). Not to be outdone, she got out the tape measure and had me stand against the wall…
…turns out I’m actually 5’ 8” – and on the short end of that.
Shortness doesn’t really matter, of course. It’s like pointing out that grips are more likely to have tattoos or script supervisors to wear glasses: informal generalizations that will always have exceptions and follow no particular trend to any particular conclusion.
When I asked the director that day whether she knew any tall AC’s, she thought for a few moments before being distracted with actual matters a director has to deal with.
Meanwhile, I started prepping the camera for driving shots inside the back of a Honda Element with the seats removed. I was told I’d be one of four crew in the back – director, DP, sound mixer, and myself – alongside the camera. “OK, well, let’s make it fit then,” I thought as I stretched my legs between and around the hi-hat the grips had secured with ratchet straps.
“You’re right,” the director said from behind as she climbed in minutes later, “Colin is too tall.”
She nodded to my legs. I looked down at the pretzeled contortion they had made to get right up against the camera and laughed: Colin really would have had a harder time squeezing back there!
In my unofficial research I’ve certainly never found any correlation between height and skill in camera assistants; the slate doesn’t clap any differently based on stature nor does the follow focus care how tall you are. That said, grips may prefer a towering person pulling focus considering I need a full apple box to stand on more than I’d care to admit. And, well, being taller would save my neck from craning up on some of those handheld shots with bigger operators.
But as we were crunched up in the back of that car driving over potholes and cobblestones, I had the last laugh as the shortest – and by far the most comfortable – person in the back.
